NiNiNicolette?
by insideimasadrainbow
Summary: Nico wakes up and finds that he's no longer a 'he'. crack one shot. slight Percy/Nico? T for lango. I wish crack was labeled as a genre.


**A/N:** um yes, hello. this is crack. purely crack. no one can swap genders, it's impo- wait. never mind. they can, it's just a longer process than Nico's. eh heh he he. Nico is a little (a lot) ooc in this. Percy might be too, idk. I haven't read these books in forever. I for sure know that they aren't a year apart but this is my story now suckas. it's crap but it's still mine. enjoy. or don't.

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**Ni...Ni... Nico...lette?**

Nico grumbled irritably in Italian. He was buried under his covers but his sensitive ears still picked up on the loud knocking on his cabin door. Gods help whoever was on the other side because Nico was fixing to run them through with his sword if they didn't go away.

The ravenette pulled his sheets tighter over his head to drown out the obnoxious knocking; when he did so and his elbows squeezed together, he felt the edges of his elbows squeeze something soft, something that normally wasn't there. Nico slowly popped a dark eye open to examine whatever it was that he'd touch.

His eyes must have a lot of sleep caked in them because he found himself looking at a pale tit.

Nico blinked bearily. He glanced down at his chest where soft breasts looked up at him, pale pink nipples and all.

He blinked once.

"Wha?" he mumbled, brain not comprehending anything of this new knowledge that boobs were growing from his chest. The ravenette sat up in his bed, covers falling off his lap to pool in a crumpled heap.

Something was missing. Nico felt it as soon as he was sitting upright. His hairless legs were stretched out in front of him under the covers and he pulled them up to him frowning deeply. Where... Nico peeled back the waist band of his black basketball shorts and peered down.

His eye brow twitched.

Where...

He thrusted a hand roughly down his pants and felt all around downtown. His eyes widened when his fingers brushed against something that he had definitely not been born with before slowly taking his hand out in complete and utter shock. His mouth fell open before shutting, and then opening again.

What...

Nico's hands slowly, shakily reached up to his chest, cupping perfect round B cups. He squeezed them.

How...

The son of Hades sat there in silence, not sure on else what to do. He was stumped. Last night he went to sleep as a man- well, a 17 year old teen who owned man parts. Mind you, he's still a man but with... woman parts.

And that's when it hit Nico.

...

Percy growled in annoyance. Nico wasn't a heavy sleeper, he never was so the only solution to why Nico wasn't answering the door is because he's purposely ignoring Percy. And then Percy would get chewed out by Mr. D for taking too long with getting Nico who is supposed to help Percy with the morning activities.

Nico's been at Camp Half-Blood long enough for everyone to know that he was not, under any circumstance, a morning person. Yet here they go, forcing Percy of all people to go wake up his highness who might possibly send him to Hades just for waking him up.

That still doesn't change the fact that Percy hates being ignored. "Nico!" the son of Poseidon pounded on the door for what seemed like the billionth time. "Nico, open this door!"

Passing by campers snickered in amusement as they watched Percy bang the door. "Having trouble there Percy?" one called. Percy ignored them, the hypocryte. The 18 year old held his fist up again to knock when the door flew open and Nico (or who seemed to be Nico because they were a blur) flew out, knocking them both over.

Percy managed to catch himself before he tumbled down Nico's steps. A weightless body was over his and something soft was pressed flush against his face- quite literally. Percy could barely see because of it but he could feel the other's heart racing a mile a minute.

"It's gone! It's GONE!" whoever was on him was screeching crazily. To Percy it sounded like Nico but Nico with a cold or Nico having just blown about fifty balloons by himself and the helium had taken over his voice.

Percy said something but his voice was heavily muffled by whatever was pressing to his mouth. Nico squealed and Percy found himself suddenly sailing through the air and landing at the bottom of Nico's stairs. "Don't ever mouth me there!"

"Owww!" Percy groaned and rubbed his bruising side before glaring up at Nico.

He froze.

Standing at the top of the steps was a girl with black as night hair (like Nico), wearing basketball shorts (like Nico) and was nude from her slender waist up, arms wrapped around her chest as if protecting it with her face scrunched up and flushed. Percy stared. Her face was Nico's. Well, softer and rounder but it was definitely Nico's. Percy blinked.

He didn't know Nico had a twin sister.

"Um, excuse me miss but I'm looking for Nico?" Percy said in a question. The girl sneered at him and dropped her arms, exposing her pert breasts for Percy's eyes to feast.

"It IS me you idiot!" Nico hissed. But Percy was staring at her chest. It was then Nico realized what he-she-HE did and covered himself back up. Percy blinked, cheeks growing pink.

"Uhm uh wh-what?" he asked and sat up slowly to his feet. "That's you Nico?"

"Yess and don't ask me why because I don't know why!" Nico hissed. Percy looked very confused and began mounting up the steps.

"How-" Percy started when he finally moved in front of Nico.

Nico bopped his head with one hand leaving the other still covering himself- "I said don't ask me why! And stop staring!"

Percy had been staring. He was taking in Nico's curves, his creamy milk skin that was soft to touch ("Don't touch me!"), the new profound slenderness that Nico sported. Percy's eyes ate up every new detail that was Nico before his eyes trailed to the waist band of Nico's basketball short. Nico was a blushing mess after Percy thoroughly inspected him and caught the son of Poseidon's wandering hands just in time before they peeled back his shorts.

"Hey hey hey, this is still ME Percy, so don't go molesting me!" Nico growled but his face was pink, he was hot all over and his voice was shaking. Percy blinked. And then blinked again, finally taking in Nico's distraught state.

Under the blush, Nico was sweating slightly, he was breathing a little harsher than normal- which was saying something because no one could ever tell if Nico breathed. His eyes were dark and wild, holding a panic look as if trapped- which he kind of was having being in an alien body.

Or maybe he developed this alien body? Nico shuddered and he pushed himself away from Percy, stumbling backwards into his open door and falling on the ground inside his cabin's entrance. "No no no, this can't be happening.. it's gone-"

Percy went in after Nico and tried to help him- her? back up but Nico was absolute jelly in his arms. An uncooperative jelly. He-she? just kept slipping back to the floor. "Nico, calm down-"

"CALM DOWN?! YOU WANT ME TO CALM DOWN WHEN MY DICK IS GONE?!" Nico shrieked, voice cracking and another batch of campers passed by, all stopping to stare inside the Hades' cabin in shock and confusion.

"Nico-"

"I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID TO DESERVE THIS. WHAT, DID I PISS ONE OF YOU OFF? YOU DON'T EVEN NEED TO SPEAK NOW AND FOREVER HOLD YOUR PEACE- JUST FUCKING CHANGE ME BACK YOU MOTHER FUC-" Nico had been up and yelling at the ceiling but Percy had yanked him down with a hand covering his mouth.

"Okay okay, easy there Nicolette. Don't be the cause of another war."

Nico shouted furiously under Percy's hand at the girlish name. "Listen, just listen to me- we'll go to Chiron, he'll know what to do, alright? He'll fix this and you'll be back to the nice moody way you were."

Nico bit his hand. Percy immediately pulled it back, face scrunched up in pain. "Don't you EVER call me that name again." Nico snapped before jumping to his feet, heading out the door the basketball shorts the only thing he had on. "Chiron better have some cure for this catastrophe." the feisty ravenette was muttering.

Percy scrambled to his feet and caught Nico around the waist. "What in the gods name-" Nico started angrily, a furious blush on her-HIS face.

"Nico, I hate to say this but you're a girl now and no girl I know walks out of her home without a bra or shirt-" Percy cut himself off by doubling over in pain. Nico glared down at him with a pink face.

"Don't EVER use those words with me! Like hell I'm a girl, like hell I'll wear a b-br-br-" Nico shook his head not even being able to complete the word and stormed over Percy to his bedroom. Seconds later he came back out wearing a black shirt that had one word sprawled out on the front in white letters. 'NO'

Percy righted himself up and stared at the shirt. Nico glared at him. "Problem?" the son of Hades demanded.

Percy shook his head and tried to hide his amusement From the look Nico gave him and the scathy scowl he received, he figured he was doing a pretty crap assed job at it. Still, he replied, "None at all."

Nico just grumbled and stalked out his cabin to find Chiron. To others, it looked like Nico and Percy were walking together to the dining hall. But what they didn't know that underneath Nico's clothes, something made him not Nico. A.K.A boobs and a- Nico shuddered.

'Don't think about it, don't think about it' Nico made a face. It was awful and weird to walk without something between his legs. He just had his dick yesterday, what the fuck universe. Or did this really have something to do with the universe? Deep in his thoughts Nico failed to notice they had reached the dining hall and Percy was dragging him over to Chiron.

"Chiron, we have a problem." Percy's voice snapped Nico out of his thoughts and now he was glaring at the older black haired male.

" 'We'?" Nico repeated hotly. Turning to Chiron, who was gently waving off fairly new campers, Nico crossed his arms over his chest. The rememberance of what his chest was now made him drop his arms back down, a slight blush dusting his cheeks.

Chiron looked at him in confusion before looking at Percy. "What is your problem?" he asked kindly and Percy gestured to Nico. At this point their scene was catching some campers' attention, and with all the yelling that happened earlier at the Hades' cabin, everyone was curious as to what was going on.

Chiron looked back at Nico who growled and yanked his shirt up. "This." Nico sneered and Percy slapped a hand to his forehead while everyone around them gasped, exclaimed in surprise or fell over in shock. Chiron's eyes widened as he stared at two perky breasts.

That were Nico's.

Nico who was a boy.

Son of Hades to be exact.

"Uh." Chiron cleared his throat and Percy pulled Nico's shirt back down.

Nico was unaffected. "If that's not bad enough," he started, hands gripping the waist band of his shorts. Percy saw this and stopped Nico in time before he yanked those off. "My di-"

"That's gone too." Percy said over Nico hastily and pulled the boy to him. Nico was scowling.

"You have to fix me!"

"Is there any way this can be reversed?" Percy rephrased Nico's words. Chiron looked lost.

"I do apologize," he began, "But I'm very confused- Nico, when did you change into a female?"

And to both Percy's and Chiron's horror, tears welled up in Nico's eyes and he started blubbering. "I-I don't know how I keep telling you! I w-w-woke up like th-this and I just want to be me again!" Nico covered his face. Percy hesitantly put an arm around him and drew him close. He looked to Chiron for help because that was all the comforting he could give.

Chiron stood up. "Don't you worry Nico, we'll get you back to normal. But I'll need your help to tell me all you've done in the past 48 hours and I'll see if anything triggered your... change."

"What about the gods? Do you think they had something to do with this?" Percy asked. Surprisingly the sky stayed quiet. Chiron's eye brows furrowed.

"I can't say. But I do know for a fact that no one ever switches from male to female during the night."

Nico dropped his hands from his face and pouted. "Unless you're in some crazy fanfiction."

"What." Percy and Chiron said. Nico huffed.

"Just cure me, damn it."


End file.
